There's one particular group I know that seriously emphasizes this particular aspect of scene etiquette, and I think it should definitely become a more widespread thing: Don't assume anything.
Basically, don't assume anyone's role or preference or relationship with anyone. Let me repeat that last part, for emphasis: Don't assume anyone's relationship with anyone.
So, for example, if you see a scene in progress and the top is say, using the rubber grip on her riding crop to rub between the bottom's legs, and the three people involved in said scene graciously allow you to join in, don't fucking assume you get to put your toys between the bottom's legs as well.
Maybe it's just because the people I generally play with are above average communicators, but it seems like a pretty common sense thing to ask before you touch someone's crotch with anything. I don't care if it's just your toy and not your hand, fucking ask. Ask the bottom, or, hell, ask the top who clearly has an established relationship here. But definitely, definitely, do not start touching the bottom's crotch with your toys without talking to anyone first, and doing it when the top is obviously distracted by something outside the scene makes you look like a creepy predator-type.
You know, just to pull an example out of the air. A completely fictional example.
Seriously, people, what the hell? Who does that?
Moved.
1 year ago
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